A Crowd of Introverts

I had an interaction over the weekend with someone I'd only recently met. As our conversation progressed this person made the observation that I seemed to be an introvert (and it should be noted that this person seemed to be a raging extrovert). While this was not the issue we had gotten together to talk about  - and it really only came up as a passing observation -  it got me thinking. This person probably made this observation based on the fact that I seemed to be very uncomfortable and in truth I was. Not really because of anything this person was doing, but we were sitting in a packed In-N-Out Burger (you all know my feelings on that place anyway) and here I was talking with this person I didn't really know. Crowds, mediocre burgers, and personal conversations with people I don't know well are all things that I don't usually find to be enjoyable but why should that be the case? And is it really a problem?

Now anyone who knows my family, both immediate and extended, will be well aware that we are by-in-large a group of pretty private people. I vividly recall instances of being in the check-out line with my Aunt who when the checker would ask for her zip code would respond with a dialog that would proceed something like this: 

"Why would you need that?"
"That's none of your business."
"You don't need my life history just so I can buy eggs."
"I'm not giving you my zip code so you can either take my money or I can talk to your manager."

That being said it's not like my family and I are a quiet group of people who just sit around hoping no one talks to us (obviously). We are a loud group and when we get together we mostly just talk. We love talking actually (much to any of the in-laws consternation), but we don't tend to do that with people we don't know. We are certainly not a shy bunch. Amongst the family are teachers, public officials, health care professionals, and most of us have dabbled in public performance of some kind or another (some have also managed to do some pretty embarrassing things publicly and lived to tell about it [you know who you are]). I think this quote I found online pretty much sums us up:

 
One thing we are, even with each other, is guarded. We are unwilling to let others (sometimes even ourselves) see our weakness or our fears or our despairs. (I know my family is probably sick of me talking about vulnerability by now, but I am right and we all know it!) We certainly aren't reserved about expressing our anger, annoyance, or inconvenience, and that is just us. We have loads of personality and personally I find us hilarious. That being said, you can see how these traits can make it difficult to meet and connect with people (I mean what self respecting introvert would want to do that anyway, am I right? Anyone?), but seriously being an introvert shouldn't be an excuse for not doing those things. So I (not speaking for the rest of my family, but they probably get the subtext here) should endeavor to be a little more open with people, and while not trying to make myself into an extrovert (as that will never happen) need to work on being less guarded. So in summation:

Yes, I am an introvert. No, I am not shy.  

 

 (Funny cartoon, but really, we do have personal space issues. Hug us anyway.)