A word on surgery and narcotics.
First off, if you happen to be female and have had a kid, I don't want to hear it. I'm sure it's awful and I'm sure I will never be able to relate. I had surgery last week. The doctor made it sound like it wasn't going to be anything serious, however in the end I still feel like I got stabbed in the gut and run over by a truck. In all fairness, this was my first time as a patient in a hospital so I'm not sure what I was expecting. Well, I take that back. What I was expecting was some time in a humiliating hospital gown, some pain, and a day or two of rest. I hadn't taken into account the hours of waiting, the general anesthesia, the myriad of nurses with different and often conflicting instructions, nor the narcotics (which I might add are pretty amazing). Post surgery I'm looking at a around a month of recovery. Recovery entails limping around and not lifting anything over five pounds. By the way, do you know what weighs more than five pounds, EVERYTHING! I had the singular joy of taking my bandages off today which I had built up in my head to being something akin to the terror of opening a tube of Pillsbury crescent rolls. I would just keep pulling on the packaging until I eventually popped. Luckily that didn't happen. IV's, suck. Hospital gowns suck. Operation rooms, really suck. It pretty much felt like I had been wheeled in to a morgue. I've actually been healing pretty quick and all in all modern medicine is pretty amazing. I might actually try driving tomorrow!